Back Home Baller
It’s been a week since I’ve been back under my parent’s roof and even though traveling across the country lugging oversized suitcases is totally a pain in the ass I was quickly reminded that being home for the holidays is the absolute effing greatest thing, ever. Here’s a list of 10 things that every kid who has left the nest has to look forward to when heading home sweet home.
1. The Queen Has Arrived
From the moment you step off the plane in your hometown your valet aka your dad is waiting to take your luggage and place it in the car so you don’t have to lift a finger.
2. Vacation Mode
I swear every time I come home and open my parents front door I hear a choir singing HALLELUJAH HALLELUJAH. It’s like opening the pearly gates to a free vacation.
3. Pantry #Goals
You know that moment when your parents ask you what you want from the grocery store and you feel like Beyonce and for 12 seconds you are absolutely untouchable? Yup, me too.
4. Personal Concierge
A ride to happy hour? Restaurant recommendation? Doctors appointment? Don’t worry about a thing, it will all be taken care – all you simply have to do is ask.
5. Laundry
Wait, the washer and dryer don’t require quarters? In that case, I’m doing a load just to wash one pair of socks.
6. Paparazzi
Walking out of your house can, at moments, be risky. No matter if your mother runs into a neighbor at the store or walking the dog she is bragging about how well you are conquering adulting so you better believe the neighbors want to see you first hand. My tip of advice? When they swarm back away very slowly with a big smile.
7. A Girls Best Friend
No one will ever love you as much as your family dog. Quite the confidence booster if you ask me.
8. Reunited And It Feels So Good
When your childhood best friend calls saying, “be over in 5” and poof there she is. Being surrounded by those that know you better then you know yourself should never be taken for granted.
9. Memory Lane
Having the opportunity to reflect on where you came from and all the leaps and bounds you have overcome is good for the soul. In between your grandmother dotting over you and catching up with friends make it a priority to take time out of your visit to recognize the value in reviewing your path.
10. Wiser With Age
Since we are oh so mature now * hair flip * you will realize how cool your parents are. Seriously, that wasn’t a typo – there’s a 90% chance your parents are funny so savor the moments that you get face time with them. There is nothing in the world that compares to a hug from those that love you the most.
